what does marriage mean to you?

Lubie · Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 12:03 pm Post subject: what does marriage mean to you?

This topic was brought up by my co-workers and I yesterday after hearing a song: Marriage doesn't change anything but your last name lol so I thought this could be fun to ask all of you, what do you think of this, What does marriage mean to you? Do you agree or disagree with the song?

Do you believe marriage doesn't change anything but your last name?

-This is meant for fun-

I think that it's somewhat true, however it changes that you're not someones girlfriend, you have more meaning in their life. Marriage to me is sacred and it's right in Gods eyes. And personally I can't wait to take my Husbands last name!

cherryred · Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 4:04 pm Post subject:

I think it's more than just a name change. I'm not really religious so that's not a factor for me, but I see marriage as a closer bond than simply dating. It's something more significant. Being someone's girlfriend is nice, but any one person can go out with loads of people during his or her life. How many of them actually get married? That's why I say marriage is symbolic of taking everything further.

femaleadmin · Site Admin Joined: 30 Dec 2003 Posts: 5388

the world I love it and I am so glad I did it 9 years and still really happy

Shelby - US · FemaleFirst Guru Joined: 04 Feb 2007 Posts: 5413

To me it is so much more than a name change. to me it is a spiritual and emotional committment to another person for the rest of your life. It is devotion to each others happiness and the joy of raising children. it is sharing everyday with another person for the rest of your life.

femaleadmin · Site Admin Joined: 30 Dec 2003 Posts: 5388

thats really nice that Shelby

jinjin · FemaleFirst Guru Joined: 11 Oct 2006 Posts: 85115

Although many women may choose to take on their hubby's surname, it is not a requirement. A woman my retain her surname.

I do not perceive any emotional advantages over being married or not. However, in the US (and probably most places), there may be financial advantages to being married especially when children is concerned. I interpret this as society's way of promoting the traditional family structure.

Two mature people should not need a marriage contract to be committed to each other. If a person is going to cheat, it will happen regardless of whether a marriage contract exist.

Choosing to get married is a personal choice. If you feel it is needed, then do it.

*Bambi* · Posted: Thu Jun 14, 2007 11:51 am Post subject:

Girlnextdoor · Hello. I am New! Talk to Me Joined: 20 Jul 2007 Posts: 2

After 10 years of marriage and having had three children in the space of three years three months I would say marriage means the following things to me:

- Knowing someone has "got your back" when the world seems to be raining sh!t on you

- Someone to share a cup of tea with at the end of the day and a chat about the days events

- Surviving the supermarket shop together with three kids under 4 in tow (or taking it in turns to do it alone while the other one braves the play park!)

- The other persons happiness being as important to you as your own

- Sharing the joys and sorrows of parenthood together

- A united parenting front (ie Mummy can i have a biscuit - "No you may not, Daddy already said no so don't run to me!)

- Backing each other up in front of the kids (even if you disagree in private later)

- Never putting the other one down, especially not infront of other people

- Sharing vomit cleaning up duties at three am, succesfully cleaning up the kids bed, carpet, toys, blankie and of course the child without needing to speak and say who needs to do what

- Knowing that if you absolutely have to leave sick kids with the other parent that they will know what to do, what medicine to give, when its a real emergency etc

- Being able to pick up where the other person left off when a "shift change" happens

- Knowing you can rely on the other person to do what needs to be done, or atelast tell you if for some reason they won't be able to do it

- Worrying when you hear there was an accident on the road they are travelling on for a business trip

- Succesfully "teleporting" three sleeping children into the family car (without waking them) and driving with them 80 miles in the middle of the night to where the other partner is working on an away job as you have bad news to break and want to be there to catch them when they fall, so they dont hit the ground.....

- And through this all still sharing the unique intimate relationship you had in the beginning, only better because you have emotional intimacy too.

Now I'm not saying we have got it right, there have been bad times and good in our marriage but we have achieved so much together and for the most part been extremely happy. For us the key so far has been communication, commnuicate, communicate, communicate. Whatever is going on for each of us or with us together, the one thing we don't do is bullsh!t each other. Everything is discussed openly and that way issues tend to get ironed out whilst they are little molehills, not mountains.

Cancan · Posted: Sat Jul 28, 2007 11:15 am Post subject:

I like being married I like being loved and wanted and I like being a mum