Time to choose?

[guimei]

ok, I doubt anyone will be able to answer this before it's too late, but I do actually have a problem. I'm meant to be going to Thailand tomorrow. I'll be there for about three days. Heres where it gets messy. My Not quite ex is gonna be there waiting for me. BUT I have a boyfriend here now.
Ok, a little background... Five years ago I was living in Thailand and while i was there I met a really nice guy. He is Thai, but speaks really good English. While we were together he was always working. I mean about 16 hours a day everyday of the week, so obviously I didn't get to see him all that often. Our relationship was always like that, but I was happy to wait for him. Until May last year. I went back to Thailand during the May holiday, and he was totally different! He took the whole week off while i was there and spent every day with me. He took my Dad out for dinner and then he dropped the bombshell! He asked me to marry him! He said that as his businesses are all pretty much sorted now he has a lot more time and he can focus on us now. Ok, so I was pretty chuffed with that, but at the time I had a contract in china. So I said we'll wait and see! Now to China... When I got back from Thailand I decided that I was gonna work out my contract and then go back to Thailand and see how things were with me and Deecha (the thai guy) Then I met Li Tao. I had no intention of starting a relationship with him, but these things happen, especially when you're lonely.(and it wasn't cheating, Deecha and I had agreed to see other people while we're apart) Anyway, I've been with Li Tao now since June and he has also asked me to marry him. And he's a really wicked guy. My problem comes to a head with the whole "which one do i love more" question. Am i right to go to Thailand to see how I feel and possible cheat on Li Tao, or should I just not see my not quite ex(which I'm not sure i can do) I don't want to get married yet anyway, I just want to think about who i ought to be with. I do have a pro and con list though.......
Li Tao
pro = blue Con =red

Treats me like a queen
Is willing to learn in bed
Has really nice tat's and long hair
Bought me a cat
Calls when he says he'll call(most of the time)
Like to clean
Adores me
Doesn't close the door when he goes for a poo
Wants to watch me when I go for a poo
Has a quick temper(not with me)
His job means he's away from home most of the time
He's really skinny(21" waist!)
He's jealous

Deecha

Also has nice tat's and long hair
Speaks very good English
My Dad likes him
He's very successful(12 seperate businesses(owner))
He lives in Thailand
He's really laid back
He works too hard and i never see him
I'm worried i want him just because he has money
He always breaks his promises
Has been married once with two kids and still supports the ex wife
Not sure I totally trust him.

this whole thing is driving me mad. Normally I don't even worry about this kind of thing. I don't want to hurt either of them, but I can imagine myself with both of them! What would you do?!

[Gary]

tough choice, guimei. one fellow works all the time, and the other is jealous and has a temper. (the poo watching thing is a bit different, but whatever.) maybe it's neither one. what does your heart say/ don't decide until it gives you a clear message!

[guimei]

I'm going to Thailand by the looks of it.

[StraightMale]

You're looking at pro and con lists, wondering who to spend your life with?!?

While I think it is a good idea to engage intellect when making such a major decision, I also think you should ask yourself this:

"Do I want a man that I can live with, or do I want a man I can't live without?"

It doesn't seem to me that you have found a man that you can't live without.