Posted: Wed Jul 21, 2004 9:02 pm Post subject: lonely and confused
hi everyone,, right here goes.....
I'm three months pregnant, and basically i'm all alone. My boyfriend of three years (i'm 20 he's 24) doesn't want this baby at all, nor it seems that he wants me. We've been living at his parents whilst his apartment is being built, and since i told him that i'm pregnant its all gone terribly wrong.
I admit that money wise we are completely different, i'm a temp whilst he's a high paid marketing manager. His parents are completely different to mine, they have a large spacious house, successful businesses and masses of money, my parents are the total opposite. No-one is hardly talking to me at the moment, my boyf only speaks to me when he's on about abortion or calling me a scrubba. I have a feeling that they do just want me to get out of their house, but i'm unable to do do, i have no where at all to go. Does anyone know of any sort of hostels i could go to?. I don't have much money at all and the apartment as been paid for with all of his money.
His parents must have wanted him to be with a posh, uptown girl, which i'm definitely not and could never be so.
I'm quite a quiet person, but am so lonely, confused and very vulnerable at the moment, anyone got any advice?
Posted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 6:13 pm Post subject: Hang in there
Remember - pregnancy can bring on all sorts of odd emotions - in the beginning of my current pregnancy (now 6 mos) - and even now, I occasionally feel like no one wants me around - that they all have their own lives - that my husband wanted a girl and this baby is a boy - that he is resentful because we got married when we found out I was pregnant, etc. Other days, I feel OK.
I feel so bad that you're so down, and you sound like such a sweet, quiet individual. I'm sure your boyfriend still wants you - you've been together for three years - his family welcomed you into their home while the home that the two of you are building is finished (I know you said it's his money, but he has been including you in these plans for some time, I'm sure). I do think, however, that he is having a hard time adjusting to the news of the pregnancy (as I said, ours was unplanned too - and we were happy but upset at the same time, if that makes sense). I'm sure, too, that it is stressful for all parties to have two couples living in the same house - pregnancy or no pregnancy. Hopefully, when you move into your own space, life will get easier - and.... as the pregnancy progresses, your boyfriend will get more involved.
By the way - I'm a semi high-level marketing manager too, and, believe me, the job is not that difficult. I mean - be proud of your boyfriend for what he does but don't discount what you do either - I've done temp work and worked with some really competent temps. You'll find your niche - and the type of work you do scurrently hould come in handy on days that you don't feel well or when you want time off after the baby.
Good luck and don't worry so much. Go out and find friends in a pregnancy yoga class or something - buy yourself some cute maternity clothes - start trying to enjoy the pregnancy. Picking out baby things in a surf theme got my boyfriend (now husband) more involved.